The Evil ShinRa Elevators
by ribbetfrog
Summary: Rufus enters the elevator of doom, an along the way meets Heidigger, Scarlet, Hojo, Rude, and a bunch of monkeys.


Just something that crossed my mind the other day about the elevators in the Shinra Building. Isn't it a pain to wait to go up seventy floors everyday if your office is on the top floor? Also, I'm just assuming that the building is seventy stories, that only about as high as they go in game, though it may be higher.  
  
Disclaimer: Don't own anything but the monkeys.  
  
It was Rufus's first day of working at his fathers company. Being the head honchos son of course, automatically elevated him being the Vice President, even if there were more deserving people who had worked there all their lives. He walked into the building, and noting its height, he taking the elevator was a better idea then walking up the seventy flights of stairs. He decided to take the elevator on the left, as the one on the right had a ten-person line. Not bothering to wonder why no one was standing in line for this elevator, he walked in and heard the doors shut behind him.  
  
As he looked around the prison like shaft, he noticed that there were no buttons for the floors. Then the worst part of the elevator kicked in, the ever-painful elevator music. It was unbearable. When he covered his ears to shelter them from the horrible noise, he realized that the elevator hadn't started moving. He looked in a corner and saw a big red button, and a skeleton. Rufus, not expecting to see the human remains there. He then glanced at his watch, noticing that if he didn't hurry up, he would be late. Seeing that the doors weren't going to open any time soon, he hit the red button. All of a sudden the elevator shot up in the air. And then suddenly stopped at the second floor. The doors opened, but before he could get out, someone ran in and the doors shut behind him. Rufus cursed.  
  
"Damn it, I was going to get out!" he snapped.  
  
"Well its not my fault, I'm not in charge of the elevators," said the man who Rufus recognized as Heidigger. "Who the hell are you anyway, I haven't seen you around here," he said nastily. Rufus just smirked.  
  
"I'm Rufus ShinRa, the presidents son," he said mockingly. Heidigger could be heard cursing loudly. The elevator started again, and this time stopped at the third floor. Rufus prepared to run out, but the doors didn't open. The elevator then went up to the fourth floor, and stopped there. Rufus really hoped that this wasn't going to happen on every floor, as his office was on the seventieth floor.  
  
After having the elevator stop up the tenth floor, with the doors staying shut on all different levels, the doors finally opened. Unfortunately Rufus wasn't fast enough to get out before Heidigger, and as soon as Heidigger left, Scarlet rushed in, and the doors shut. To Rufus's immense hate, she immediately started "Kya ha ha"ing. Rufus started to twitch, the laugh getting on his nerves.  
  
The elevator went up another few floors; its still stopping on everyone, but yet again the doors weren't opening. Finally, the elevator reached the thirtieth floor. At this point, Rufus had fallen to the ground twitching, and suffocating from Scarlet's perfume. The doors finally opened and Scarlet rushed out, with, to Rufus's dismay, Dr. Hojo running in. The doctor leaned over and peered at him, smirking.  
  
"So who are you? New, obviously. Want to help me in my lab?" he cackled. "You can be part of my new experiment, giving soul to Jenova to make her more powerful." Rufus ducked behind the skeleton, shivering. "Guess not," Said Hojo shrugging. Hojo now saw the skeleton more clearly. "Hey. I could use this in my lab." he muttered to himself, while slinging the skeleton over his shoulder.  
  
After going up another ten floors, the elevator doors (A/N hey that rhymes!) opened once again, and Hojo rushed out. Rufus tried to get out, but the fact that he was huddled in a corner slowed him down a bit. Rude walked in, for some reason pushing a cart of monkeys. Rufus looked at him oddly.  
  
"What's with the monkeys?" He said quizzically  
  
"." Was all Rude said. Rufus shrugged and continued to stare at the monkeys. He stuck a finger in the cage they were in, and poked one. The monkey immediately bit down on his hand. A few curses later, Rude finally said something.  
  
"Bananas doesn't like being poked," he said calmly. Rufus blinked.  
  
"They have names?"  
  
"Bananas, Bubbles, Brownie, Apple, Tree-Climber and Cuddles," Rude said, pointing to each one as he said their names. Rufus inspected Cuddles, who was missing chunks of fur, had one eye, and was baring his teeth. Rufus decided not to poke that one. They finally got up to the sixty-ninth floor, where Rude exited the elevator, wheeling the monkeys in front of him.  
  
Rufus figured that since his office was on the next floor, the elevator would stop there. He was wrong of course, mistaken, and his screaming could be heard throughout the building as the elevator went all the way back down to the first floor.  
  
Epilogue  
  
Rufus finally got out of the elevator, and decided that walking up seventy flights of stairs wasn't such a bad idea after all. Unfortunately, to this day, he has a phobia of elevators. No one ever found out what Rude did with those monkeys, though Cuddles became the ShinRa Company mascot under threat of death.  
  
~Ribbetfrog 


End file.
